MORGANTOWN, WV – Local precision rifle legend and reigning King of 2 Miles, Brock "The Bullet" Remington, was admitted to Ruby Memorial Hospital this weekend following his participation in the NRA World Shooting Championship. Remington, known for his sub-0.2 MOA groups at 1,500 yards with a custom 6.5 PRC built on a Terminus Zeus action with a 28-inch Bartlein Heavy Palma contour barrel, reportedly suffered an acute case of ballistic cognitive dissonance after several stages required him to engage targets at less than 100 yards with firearms completely alien to his meticulously trued workflow.
Witnesses recounted Remington's visible distress during the "Pistol Caliber Carbine Speed Stage," where he was observed attempting to input density altitude corrections into his Garmin Foretrex for a static target at 25 yards. Sources close to the shooter confirmed his Nightforce ATACR 7-35x56 with the Mil-XT reticle, typically used for intricate wind holds and Coriolis adjustments, remained uncapped throughout a 12-gauge shotgun stage, leading to fears of irreparable reticle corruption. "He kept muttering about 'zero shift' and 'spin drift' while loading slugs," stated one bewildered range officer.
Remington's medical team noted severe psychological trauma from being forced to fire un-handloaded ammunition, specifically factory 9mm and .22LR, without a LabRadar to verify SD/ES across velocity nodes. His DOPE card, meticulously laminated for 2,000-yard engagements, was reportedly found crumpled in his pocket, covered in what appeared to be shotgun shell residue. Physicians are now monitoring Remington for symptoms of 'precision muscle memory degradation' and 'reticle pattern confusion,' a condition where the brain struggles to differentiate between a Mil-XT and the primal act of pointing a short-barreled firearm.
